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Insales, we all know how much importance our communication skills carry in the field. Plenty of sales and communication trainings helped to improve those and most of the syllabi have one thing in common; the focus on process and content.

Remember the last awesome and exciting date you had. Can you still remember what you were talking about or was it the way of communication and emotional connection you felt; which made the big difference?

Let’s get one step back and assume that sales is a kind of flirting and it is more important of how you say it rather than what you say. This is the point where our short and powerful word “but” gets into the game. Remember the last time you made your point supported with proven facts and in return the word “BUT” was thrown into your face? Depending on the circumstance you might even see the hand or fist reaching your face. How did you feel about it?

Yes, your client makes the point that your solution is more expensive than competition. But isn’t it a fact that your product is more reliable, more performant and achieves even higher cost-savings over time?

Imagine you’ve missed the class at school where you were supposed to add the word “BUT” to your amazing vocabulary. Furthermore, you also forgot the words “however” and all these tiny little phrases going into the same direction; slapping your client, friend, colleague, manager or whoever you are talking to. And now as you forgot the small little word, you replace it by “AND”.

I still remember the hard task to convince my mum of me buying my first motorbike. It might get a little bit tough to talk to high-authority asking for permission for something you already know it might be a lost battle. This is exactly the point where the minor change of approach kicks in. Instead of fighting a battle, how about peace negotiations?

“Riding a motorbike is way too dangerous. You might get hurt or even worse.” Good point, useless to fight and hard to overcome. And this is the point where the amazing word “AND” gets very handy. “Yes, it is quite true that riding a motorbike is more dangerous than driving a car. And this is also the point where you start to sharpen your traffic awareness as you pay your full attention to other motorists and pedestrians while car drivers change the radio channel or talk to their passengers.” The conversation went on for about 10 minutes carrying plenty of “ANDs” at the same calm and friendly level. Two months later a brand-new Yamaha got its new home in our garage.

This is just a very easy going communication strategy which you can apply in every circumstance in every situation. You will be amazed of how much fun you are going to have during the previously tough negotiations at a very friendly and respectful level. My suggestion: Stop slapping your communication partner and “HAPPY-ANDing”.